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Soy boy snowflakes and magenta-haired feminazis are desperately searching for ways to cope with the Inauguration of President Donald J. Trump. One therapist is recommending something called “forest bathing.”
“You’ll feel humbled,” therapist Anindita Bhaumik told Time. “This mountain is going to be there forever and ever, and you’re one human being standing here. Everything comes and goes, but nature is still there.”
It sounds a bit dirty if you ask me. I’m not sure anyone needs to see a dirty leftist lathering up in the woods.
Time Magazine offered 11 “science-backed” activities people can invoke on Monday to cope with their “sense of hopelessness” about the return of the age of commonsense values and God-given pronouns.
Group crying is a rather popular way to cope for those suffering from terminal cases of Trump Derangement Syndrome.
Group crying was another recommendation in the report.
“It might seem counterintuitive, but if you need to shed a few tears on Inauguration Day, it’s healthy to let them out with one caveat: You shouldn’t do it alone,” Time reported.
Psychology experts and therapists suggested a variety of activities that could help those emotional about Trump’s return take their focus off their anxiety and gain a new perspective, Time reported.
Working out can “wrest back a sense of power that you might feel is missing on Inauguration Day,” the report said. “You might not be able to do anything about the new administration’s policies, but you know what you can do? Fifteen perfect-form jumping jacks.”
Other mental health experts suggested making a vision board, journaling or perhaps an interpretative pole dance set to some sort of lesbian power anthem.
It turns out that forest bathing is some sort of Japanese relaxation method which involves getting in touch with nature. It does not necessarily require one to strip buck naked and shower in the azaleas.
Although, with the onset of the ecosexual movement, I’d be wary of tree huggers in the woods. There’s no telling when an innocent forest bath could turn into the next national sex scandal. And I’m not sure America is ready to tack the “Tree Too” movement.
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