Senator Rand Paul unveiled his tenth annual Festivus Report this week – a deep-dive into how the federal government is using tax money generated by the hard-working American people.
It’s similar to what Elon Musk and Vivek Ramaswamy are doing with the new Department of Government Efficency. But Senator Paul, the Republican from Kentucky, was DOGE before DOGE became a household name.
This year’s Festivus Report is absolutely appalling – exposing more than ONE TRILLION DOLLARS in government waste. So, in the spirit of Festivus, let’s air our grievances.
Your government is spending $20 million on a new version of Sesame Street based in Baghdad. That’s right, folks. Muslim muppets are coming to television sets across Iraq – courtesy of the American taxpayers.
The Agency for International Development (USAID) says the Baghdad-based show will promote “inclusion” and “mutual respect.” I can see it now – “Tickle Me, Ahmed” and Big Bird in a burka. Let’s just hope they inspect Oscar the Grouch’s trash can for possible improvised explosive devices.
Your government is also spending $4.8 million on Ukrainian influencers, more than $32,000 on breakdancing and $12 million for a pickleball complex in Las Vegas.
“Apparently, what we really need in a war zone are more Instagram stories and TikTok dances. The dangers here are more than just cringe worthy content; this kind of spending opens the door to disinformation, propaganda, and international PR disasters,” Paul said. “And don’t even get me started on the potential to escalate tensions with other nations.”
Your tax dollars are also funding a Bearded Ladies Cabaret – and a drag show on ice. The show features polar bears, drag queens and a character called “nonbinary parental guardian nature.” Ice skating drag queens are apparently the answer to resolving climate change.
Plus, more than 7 million dollars on magic tricks – literal hocus pocus. $10 million on cat experiments. And more than $400,000 to determine if lonely rats have a better chance at getting high on cocaine than happy rats.
But that’s not all folks.
$20 million on fertilizer – loads of it – bound for Pakistan, Vietnam, Columbia and Brazil. The US is actually exporting our excrement.
Last Festivus, the national debt was nearing $34 trillion. This year – it’s well beyond $36 trillion.
President Trump’s DOGE has been tasked with eliminating some $2 trillion from the budget. Sounds like they need to trim some $5 trillion.
Enough is enough. Call your elected leaders. Send them an email and tell them you don’t want your hard-earned money used to fund Ukrainian TikTok stars or drag queens on ice or Sesame Street in Baghdad.
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